feeling lost....

Been two weeks now since I arrived home, after staying away (abroad) for about six years... though I had the chance to visit home twice, this time its different. because I am staying home for good...

Back when I was still there, there are lots of things in my mind that I was planning to do once I am home.  But now after two weeks, I have not accomplished any of these plans yet.  Things turned our really different from what I had expected while I was still away.  And now I really feel lost...  Don't know where to start.  Have to reset my focus, refresh my mind... and start thinking all over again.

But what is it really that I want to do... I want to be a full time mother to my two very young kids (4 & 2 years old only)  But then, I still have lots of other obligations, like financial obligations... honestly, my husband's income is not enough to just support my two kids, and we are staying in my parents' house plus there are debts to pay to my siblings...In short I am financially broke (drowned in financial difficulties).

New Year, New vision....

Hi there,

It's the fifth day of the year already... so what happened to you so far... me nothing big yet...so far.

Still here, waiting for something to happen (hoping it is according to my will)...

Last year was not a good year for me at all... though it started just fine, it ended up as my worst, saddest year ever.  But, looking back, who could I blame, none but myself... I had so many great plans when the year started, I just failed to live with these plans.  I was not brave enough to do what I really wanted to and have done things that I don't want to... (silly)  And that made things worst...  I thought I have learned from my previous mistakes in life, but I realized to I haven't. Not yet...really, and I am very sad about it.

For this year, 2013... I hope and pray really hard, that whatever happened in 2012 remained in there only.  I am really going to try my hardest to walk away from all the bad things of 2012, and I will just carry with me the lessons of that painful year...

May God be with me this year and for the rest of my life as  I will work hard not to stay away from Him, ever...

Welcoming 2013

Wow, It's New Year Again... which reminds me that time really flies and it' too fast...

I still could not forget, many people have posted in their Facebook walls about the End of the World in December 21, 2012... Many people must have believed int it, some were curious ( I am actually one of those curious one) about what will happen to us should the world really end. I am worried, because I am very very far from my kids...and I could not help but worry about them.  Silly me, yes, I was really silly and stupid to even have thought about it. Saying that I am a Christian, I asked myself, Where has my faith gone? Why am I even thinking about the world is to end?

But if we think about it more openly, it is true that the world has indeed ended. 2012 has end and we have now a New world in 2013. I'm just hoping that that it would be a better one for us... that we can be better this time...

I was only saying, if we can change the world for a better one, by changing ourselves to be better ones...

How about that


Happy 2013 World!